This is what they call, LIFE.

一個人躺著，靜靜地聼著自己的心跳，

雙眼閉上，沉浸在黑暗中，看不見自己的蹤影，聼不見所有。

眼淚濕潤了臉蛋，提醒了自己原來是那麽的懦弱，告訴自己不該是那麽的脆弱，務必堅強起來，面對人世，挑戰一切。

哭過就好了，笑著來應戰。

再苦也好，這就是所謂的人生。

I admit, I cried for those stuffs that I usually cried for, either one. == yucks, I hate myself.

I scarce know why today I am so tired, outrightly worn out. But still, I have to practice my piano because today is Wednesday  I hate Wednesday since the class has been changed to Wednesday. *sigh.

Then, when I was practicing my scales and those bla bla so on, it was totally sucks! Feeling like going to spill out some bad words to revile myself. @#$%@#$%^&*(*&^%$# 

When I was, indeed, crying.. I kept telling myself those negative thoughts which seized my mind will go away after the tears had stopped.

Hence, I didn't stop myself from crying out loud. I just 'blew out' every unhappy things at once. I don't want to care anymore, there is nothing left for me to worry. Empty heart, Empty palace. 

However, I told myself something I guess it's right. I play for myself, not for the exam or even for the 'tick' on the date. 

Since the day I started to play piano, I didn't expect any benefits from it, I merely want to enjoy what it gives to me, that's all. NOTHING else at all!

However, one thought changed my mind. wth, I am so fragile. 

I shouldn't start the lesson, I SHOULDN'T! Because it's not my style, not my objectives of playing piano.

I don't what to be like this, play for the exam, play for not disappointing my teacher! I don't what like this!  This isn't what I want! NO! 

I just want to be free to play anything I want! Maybe the lesson gives me more than I expected, but I don't like to be bound. 

I don't like to take exam, I hate them.. Because I am afraid of encountering the failure. I always aim for the best, I want to be the apple, I want to be the star. But those, are not belong to me, I don't deserve it. 

After the tears had stopped, I told myself, yesh, I should be stronger! People shouldn't be like this, fragile, we need more courageous to go on. People shouldn't be weak, coward! 

Be Brave and Strong. 

Aspirate to be protected? Then, you should protect yourself first, no others.