Heyyo guys I'm back after two weeks! Actually, I should be doing my revision for my finals right now, but to be genuinely honest, I have no feelings yet. I guess something is going really wrong inside of me now. Well, I do feel something, a bundle of nerves, yet my mind isn't controlling my body to do the action! Less than 10 days from my finals, and I still have very vague understanding of Economics and yet to do the 'research' for my literature. I think Accounts and Maths shall be okay, because they are the last two subjects, so I'll have plenty of time to deal with them. But Economics... Despite my sister keeps saying it's easy and mostly common sense, but still I have a very surface of comprehension about it. Moreover, it's more than 10 chapters. fml OKAY, I shall stop whning about my procrastination. And look forward to my semester break instead. *HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA*
hmmmph, I don't know why I am here hahahahaha, I just have the feeling to write something and babbling about my unknowing life. Yeap, ignorance. I know so little about my life. I've only known about it for more or less 17 years and I have no idea how long I can live. What will the future bring me? Will my dream come true? Can my dream come true if I keep the same pace as now? Life has too many unknowns, too many unsolved questions, yet somehow we still move on. Mostly because moving on is the only choice that left to us. Or perhaps, the curiosity that planted deep inside us which motivate us to move on and see what can our future be.
Life is a mystery as we have limited knowledge about our future, or even what will happen in the next minute. Maybe while I am typing all these whines, there are thousands and millions of stories happening on the other side of the earth which I can never acknowledge. The world is too big for me to understand and explore. I can't never understand or know everyone who is living their pathetic life here and it would probably take me countless years to accomplish that.
"To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people just exist"
- Oscar Wilde.
My favourite quote of all, as it reminds me to live my life, not just simply exist. I guess in the past, I simply exist most of the time and I lost my own, personal goal of life. Then, I saw this and awaken me to live my kind of life. I don't want just exist, I want to live. I want my life filled with a riot of colours and experience all kind of lifestyles. Life would be wasted if you only stick to one kind of lifestyle. We shall undergo different lives despite good or bad, and experience and learn from them. That's my kind of life that I want to live the most. Life isn't supposed to be too good, we shall encounter some slightly unfortunate to level up ourselves and be a little bit more knowledgeable about life. After all, we will eventually turn into ashes right..... So why not play a little bit unsafe to expose ourselves to a wider space and enrich our feelings?
No pain, no gain, you have to sacrifice in order to gain more. As I always say, life is a equilibrium trade. You may not gain what you deserve, but you gain something which you yet to acknowledge and could be helpful during crucial moment. All we need to do is to let go.
And another arduous task in the world is letting go. *playing 'Let It Go" from Frozen in the background*