I feel like writing something, but my mind is just blank and plain. lol I hate this feeling when I want to do something yet my mind isn't cooperating. Weird right. lol This is definitely not the first time happen in my blog or in my daily life. hahaha
My life recently is just clueless. I'm gonna sit for my music practical examination in next Tuesday which I am totally unprepared. I had not been practising my piano for almost two weeks, and my big day is approaching terrifyingly. I don't know why am I behaving like this, which I myself know it is really wrong and irresponsible, but I just lose my motivation, my passion which have turned into mist. I don't want to make my interest into a burden, I hate examinations, any kind of that. Well, who would love it anyway. Whenever examination strikes, I feel it's a burden on my shoulders and I can barely breathe. *I am finding excuses to not sit for that exam* lol I am seriously, regret so much for making that decision, and I should have chose self-study. whatever, it will not change any single fact that coming Tuesday is my big day. Another reason to moan over my sad life.
The next thing is I hate myself for being so weak. Weak in controlling myself, my desire to spend money. fml so much right now. I am so into beauty stuff nowadays. hahahaha And I guess I've spent a lot of my "possessions" on my collection. I am student ya'know, so I have barely extra money for that, and so I have to sacrifice my saving. fml Okay, I am feeling really guilty right now. damn. So much wanted to punch myself in my face. lol
OKAY can you stop crappin'.
I shall convince myself that, life is not getting harder, it is just becoming a little different than the old one. And I have to overcome the varies to make it comfortable for myself to live. So, I need to be stronger.
|My fav ^|
keep moving, people.
take care, love ya'll